"It's my wedding, it's supposed to be what I want," says 25-year-old Chrissy, who is in a huge battle with her mom over how much money is spent on her big day. They are literally arguing over every decision as Chrissy dreams of a lavish affair and her mother balks at the costs, leaving them in a complete standstill. "We're very hard headed; one of us will get angry, one of us will storm away - the conversation is finished!"

Not only do they need to resolve the specific issues, they also want to reconcile before Chrissy walks down the aisle. "It just bothers me that she's going to have to look back and say we just fought the whole time," her mom Barbara says. Rachael introduces them to Dr. Charles Sophy, the author of Side By Side who says mothers and daughters have a particular knack for these kinds of disputes. "It is the only relationship that I truly see in my practice that can go from best friends to mortal enemies and back and forth within 10 seconds!" he notes. "The power is great."

He says it's crucial for Chrissy and Barbara to find a better way to communicate and compromise. "There are rules of talking and being respectful," he says, "follow that and you will get to the point where you are able to resolve." And he says the secret to better communication is to recognize these four truths:

• Moms and daughters want the same thing in the relationship: Love, understanding and respect. You've got to give them to get it!

• They speak a nonverbal language through gestures that can trigger each others' frustrations.

• They compete.

• Both have estrogen! "It's diabolical when you're heated up," Dr. Sophy says. "There are lots of things that can go wrong."